Behind these hazel Eyes
by Errol's Feather
Summary: Natalia gets her heart broken. Songfic.


**DISCALIMER:** I don't own CSI:Miami and i don't make any money from it.

_**Behind these hazel eyes.**_

_**Seems like just yesterday  
You were a part of me  
I used to stand so tall  
I used to be so strong  
Your arms around me tight  
Everything, it felt so right  
Unbreakable, like nothin' could go wrong  
Now I can't breathe  
No, I can't sleep  
I'm barely hanging on**_

Natalia were in bed crying, she had just had her heart broken by a man she thought loved her more than anything, unlucky she was wrong. Now she was there shivering hardly, not being able to breath, to think, he was all that went through her mind. She just didn't understand how he could do that. She had felt that everything was going the right way. That they were intoned with each other and she had even started to hope for a future with him. And then suddenly out of nowhere he had told her that he was no longer in love with her, that he wanted to end it.

Shivering she let out his name still in tears wishing he was there to hold her, she longed for him to make her feel safe knowing that that wouldn't happen. Not now.

_**Here I am, once again  
I'm torn into pieces  
Can't deny it, can't pretend  
Just thought you were the one  
Broken up, deep inside  
But you won't get to see the tears I cry  
Behind these hazel eyes  
**_  
It was early the next day that her alarm went off to wake her, she looked at it with tired and red eyes. If she had slept at all she didn't quite know.

She looked at the picture of the two of them still on her nightstand even a week after they had broken up, and again her tears started to fall.

She didn't want to go to work as he was there as well and it hurt, it really hurt, but there was no way he would see her cry, there was no way she was breaking down in front of him, that she could do at home alone.

At work she showed her strong side acting like it was no big deal, but at home she couldn't hold her self together, it was simply too hard.

It felt like a knife was cutting through her heart and twisted around, she could hardly stand it. She hated it, to feel like this, to not be stronger.

She sighed as she finally managed to get herself out of bed and heading towards the bathroom to get ready for yet another day.

_**I told you everything  
Opened up and let you in  
You made me feel alright  
For once in my life  
Now all that's left of me  
Is what I pretend to be  
So together, but so broken up inside  
'Cause I can't breathe  
No, I can't sleep  
I'm barely hangin' on**_

How could she let him so close, to even think he was the one, to think that he was different than the rest? To dare to believe that he could love her the way she loved him. Now all she got was pity looks from everyone.

She thought about their last five months together, how he had made her feel like the luckiest girl in the world, how he had made her wounds heal. How he had been the one to make her smile and the one to dry her tears. How they had talked about everything and how he had treasured her. Just to take it all away.

"Natalia are you OK?" she heard Calleigh asked in a concerned tone.

"Just fine," she heard her self answered. Oh how she hated that question.

"You sure?" the blonde asked.

"Mhm," she said not looking up, knowing that if she did she would most likely fall apart.

"I'm sorry," the blonde said.

"It was not your fault, if you can excuse me, I'll be right back," said Natalia heading quickly towards the bathrooms as Calleigh just looked after her with sympathetic eyes as she knew how much her friend was hurting right the. As she had been there before.

_**Here I am, once again  
I'm torn into pieces  
Can't deny it, can't pretend  
Just thought you were the one  
Broken up, deep inside  
But you won't get to see the tears I cry  
Behind these hazel eyes  
**_

"Natalia," the blonde spoke from outside the stall door hearing the brunette's soft sobs from the inside.

"Just, just leave me," it was answered with a shaky voice from inside.

"Please Natalia," she said calmly.

And just like that the door was opened and she saw her on the floor, eyes red from crying in a very poor condition saying, "I really thought he was the one."

"I know Natalia, I know," said Calleigh and said down next to her, letting her friend find comfort in her shoulder still crying.

"Can't, can't let him see me like this, got to keep it together," she said sadly.

"He wont," Calleigh promised.

"Need to get back out," she let out with a sigh, but it sounded more like a whisper.

"There is no hurry," said the blonde knowing that she needed a bit more time just the, stroking her back to soothe her.

_**Swallow me then spit me out  
For hating you, I blame myself  
Seeing you it kills me now  
No, I don't cry on the outside  
Anymore...  
**_

It was a few days later in the break room, Calleigh and Natalia was in the break room talking and laughing when he walked in and she froze.

Calleigh noticed and turned her head to face her again. He was on the phone sweet taking with someone. The blonde looked at her reaction knowing she was thinking "So I didn't mean more to you as you could move on that fast." Or maybe he had meet her while they were still together and that was why he broke it up. Calleigh only knew one thing and that was that it was killing her. She could see it with the look on her face.

He hung up and asked, "Mind if I barrow the paper if you are done with it?"

"No, no," she said and handed it over.

He walked over to read it on the counter not to interrupt them. Just looking at him made her scream inside. Calleigh silently nodded towards the door and Natalia walked back which made them both get up and walk towards it.

Just as they passed them he said, "It was my sister."

"Huh," she said confused.

"The one on the phone," he said.

"I don't care, who you talk to is your business not mine," she answered feeling a little relif.

He didn't say anything more, just went back to the paper while the two of them left the room._**  
**_

_**Here I am, once again  
I'm torn into pieces  
Can't deny it, can't pretend  
Just thought you were the one  
Broken up, deep inside  
But you won't get to see the tears I cry  
Behind these hazel eyes  
**_

A moment later she was falling apart in the car on the way to a new scene so Calleigh felt it was best that she pulled over so she could drive instead. Natalia didn't argue on that, just switched seats still crying.

"Do you want me to take you home?" Calleigh asked.

"No, I'm good, just hurts, just the thought of him being with someone else so fast," she sobbed.

"I don't think he is, if he says it's his sister," said Calleigh.

"I know he was telling the truth about that, but why else would he break it off all of a sudden," she said.

"I really don't know," said Calleigh knowing it was probably better to believe he had moved on than the million other reasons he could have.

"Hurts," she cried so hard that she was shivering in the other woman's arms.

"I know, Nattie I know," said Calleigh, just holding her not knowing what else to do or say, she felt helpless, so she just did what she knew would probably help, let her cry it out._**  
**_

_**Here I am, once again  
I'm torn into pieces  
Can't deny it, can't pretend  
Just thought you were the one  
Broken up, deep inside  
But you won't get to see the tears I cry  
Behind these hazel eyes**_

Calleigh ended up driving Natalia home and to drive over and check on her later that day. She knocked on her door, but there was no answer so she felt if it was open, which it was before walking inside.

"Natalia," she called out, but there was no answer, so she headed upstairs assuming her bedroom and Natalia herself was there.

She was right as as she came closer she could hear soft sobs from the bedroom.

She opened the door and found her crying sadly, hugging a pillow. Calleigh walked in and sat down beside her, gently stroking her saying, "Oh Nattie."

"Calleigh," she whispered calming down a little.

"Mhm, I'm here and I'm not going anywhere," she said calmly.

Natalia didn't replay to this, she just leaned on the hand that was stroking her cheek, and slowly closed her eyes. Calleigh just smiled a little watching as in her half sleep before she was really gone Natalia grabbed on to her hand holding it hardly.

Feedback always welcome and very much appriciated :o)


End file.
